The Paradox of ‘My Life’, ‘I' and ‘We'

We the people...

The more progressive the human race is becoming, the more it thinks that each of its individuals is becoming independent, individually.

Socially bound together, humans have lasted since the decline of the Ice Age. It's really hard to tell how the relationships of man and woman, kids and parents and siblings used to be at that time, but what is quite known is that we survived because we were together, not collectively, but responsibly.

But is the social life of a man all about survival?

Survival tends to be a broad term in the human race. We don't survive simply to live tomorrow, but also to live a decade after and also after that and after that too, unlike animals, which wake up, eat, hide, and run all day just to rise again tomorrow and repeat the cycle, or simply to be alive the next moment it feels the eyes of a predator on its back. For that is taken care of by the well-established administration in the various well-divided but less protected boundaries of the landmass: countries.

Humans keep the record for the future, and also we dig further into the dirt and archives to look behind.

We do not just want to establish a connection with the present society, but also the with the past and the future too: Time travel is just a mere expression of it.

We want to stop the wrongdoings of the past to have a better present, and seek the technology of the future, to have even a better future from which we took such technology.

We can't deny the fact of how farmers and soldiers are equally responsible for a country's stability of all kinds, whether political, economic or social; and it will also be very rude to deny the role of parents and teachers in our life.

What about siblings and friends? They belong to the most inseparable part of our memories since they are the relationships that are of fewer boundations.

How about movies, TV shows, F.r.i.e.n.d.s for example, news, influencers, millennials, Instagrammers, YouTubers, actors and actresses, Super Heroes, Super Villans. My friends call me ross, sometimes joey, even I know some Rachels, Chandlers and Pheobes.

What about people who come and go, or even those who walk along our life without being friends, siblings, guardians or even well-wishers People who have no apparent role to play in our lives, but still good news or bad news related to them make us think, even for a second.

What about our enemies and allies? These remain far away from us, but play a role of shaping us, stressing us, and preparing us for the worst and the best.

And then Me, you are reading what my brain (as on 18 Sep 2022, 1100hrs IST).
What role this blog(s) play in your life?
As a reader, you are there trying to add something to the blank of your life that might have been left blank or a void was created due to corruption in your own world.

What about YOU?

You call yourself an 'I'. You pronounce yourself with 'I' and use me, mine whenever something or some situation belongs to you.

But what role have you played lately, that favored yourself completely and independently?

I think you might have nodded along all the paragraphs above the line "What About YOU?" your eyes went faster and slower at the same time and you became more observant to see what I have written for you....isn't that somewhat right?

Maybe yes...Maybe no...

But really what about YOU, when was the last time you did things for and by yourself which indicates the separation of 'you' from the entire society that surrounds you.

That sentence never ended with a question mark.

My ears, since now I'm growing, learning and thus becoming more silent, have heard the phrase uttered out from many lips "It's my life."

I am no one to judge, whether it is a foolish statement or not, but it is you who is the judge now.

Even I tend to use this statement many times, though its expression has now more of an internal expression and less vocal tone.

But the more I use it, the less thankful I feel towards the society who shaped me to become who I am...or did it?

Obviously, life in 21 century is less of jungle raj, unless and until we reside in a dictatorial regime or are stuck in civil war. We have people to complain, about the harms caused by others that impacted our growth of us.

Also, we live in a less of perfect state, since we see poverty, disease, difference, and violence prevalent in the streets.

But are you safe? I suppose yes...you are.

But are you still under threat? Yes all of us are...though these threats remain hidden and wait for the glory of peace, harmony, and law to wear out, and then slowly they will appear one by one to stab you in your own house.

And once some knives are about to be forced in, a crowd will come to your aid.

This is what we call society. A fabric that protects its like and rejects what harms its integrity.

But where was the 'I' that we often used?

It fainted the moment it saw the threat coming on to you.

What is 'I'?

It is an urgent need to claim that the 'you' belong to you and then the situation like victory, winnings, memories, and objects like medallions, newspaper cuttings with your name, then your bank balance, assets, etc.

Also, it's a term used to separate yourself from the fuss of life like regrets, unkept promises and commitments, blunders, crimes, and other acts of shame that follow you like a shadow, and grow larger when you are under the spotlight.

The 'I' is often used as a tool to claim your life and also to realize you have control over it and the choices that belong to it.

But the 'I' originates when we gain consciousness and dies when we lose consciousness. The 'I' is stronger with the name and identity but it persists to exist without it too.

However, in reality, the 'I' is not the identity, not the life, not misery, not the winning, and neither the choice, but only a voice that claims to own all of it.

It claims to make the choices, and it's a positive outcome but also fails to accept the loss and the insult which follows it.

It restricts, what we think is right than what usually is, and suddenly when someone offers help, the 'I' from the inside cries out, "It is my life, and my choice."

It behaves like the choices are its right and of none others, but forgets they are the offerings of the society.

It prompts us to claim ourselves as a protagonist of our own story, whereas in reality, when terror and agony befall us, the 'I' disappears like it never existed.

And then either the 'I' vanishes from the inside, letting us realize that we need help, or it still persists as a weak voice and says "you don't need help, you need the right time, you did it earlier, and you can do it now" and then we keep waiting for the right time, clenching our fists, hugging or thighs and pulling them closer to our body, and resting our heads onto our knees as if, bracing for an impact.

The 'I' hides itself behind what we call EGO, and we kept blaming the wrong dude every time. We are sorry EGO.

Difference between the 'I' and EGO.

Both appear to be similar and are said to be used interchangeably, whereas one is the camouflage of the other.

EGO is the awareness of oneself. It is about not losing oneself in a group and maintaining individuality amongst others. It helps us to realize our potential by looking in our past and becoming more ambitious for the future.

'I' on the other hand, envy the style of how ego helps us by silently accepting our guilts, faults, and failures and striving for the best. Therefore it befriends EGO and slowly begins to empower it with a sense of independence.

*'I' is what we often call the Negative EGO.

And when "individuality amongst society" begins to grow into the false realization 'Only Individuals in the society', we see things beginning to fall apart.

When no eyes are on us, we tend to seek attention, and when all eyes are on us we only want appreciation.

Relations, friends, assets, allies, balance from the outside, and the SELF of the inside begins to fall apart.

Since the 'I' makes us realize that society must not impact us negatively, must only offer positivity and our wrongdoings never impact society and when they do, cry out "It's MY Life" to silence them away.

Interdependence

Socially we are webbed together. I fancy the phrase 'knitted together'. It is important to understand that we owe people the outcome of our deeds and whatever we do, it impacts the surroundings; for a short time maybe, but yes it does.

Law was made to control those who enjoyed only one-sided liberty: Murderers, thugs, Rapists, etc.

Rules are made to curb those who prioritize themselves over others, but still have a percentage of giving the priority to others: No smoking zone, no parking, no horn, etc.

Conventions and protocols are made for those who act ignorant but are still aware: greet when you meet, say sorry, please, etc.

Understandings....these are made for those who value silent connections: I don't need to explain this, you the reader knows it well. ( see you understood)

Society has all types of codified, written, unwritten but existing objectively and unwritten but existing subjectivity kind of norms, which helps a smoother functioning and better relationship amongst various individuals.

It offers forgiveness, chances, opportunities, and choices along with rights to all who once left the social fabric but again want to enter inside it.

Society has always been overwhelming and restrictive but with observation and examples, it accepted the change.

There were times, when both men and women were killed when they went against the church to explore science, when people found it sinned to travel across the horizon, when genders were only two and the third was an evil, when sex was only for reproduction and not for spirituality when women were convicted as witches if they knew to read and write when humans were identified as blacks or coloured and were treated as inferior etc.

But gradually it changed...and now society restrains less but offers more.

Conclusion:

The first lesson of any leadership or public speaking class or military training corps is of the replacement of 'I' with 'We, 'My' with 'ours' and 'Myself' with 'Us'.

It is not to simply involve the entire public, but to signify that everyone owes responsibility to everyone.

There exists no collective noun, without individuals.

Trust me, it's not our life if it is only for us, but it is for the 'I' that resides within us.

Self Esteem, Ego, and 'I' are used interchangeably when arrogance, ignorance, and perversion befall us.

Each of the three terms may indicate the individuality of a person in a group, but the intensity of collective responsibility falls as one progresses from self-esteem towards the 'I'.

'I' have always heard people saying, "It is 'My' life" and it irritated 'Me' a lot. So, 'I' wrote this blog anticipating that people may stop using it and 'I' can have fewer irritations in 'my' life.

Not a very inclusive conclusion right...

This is how 'we' conclude the conceptuality of 'I'.